The possessed potato

My "so" called life

Running Up That Hill — February 29, 2016

Running Up That Hill

On good days I pretend to myself that I was sent an autistic family (partner and children, 2 out of 5, so far…) to challenge me, that I am some kind of “empowered being” that someone out there or up there or where bloody ever, thought I could cope and should do so… and I do cope, but somedays that is all I do.

On bad days well anything and everything goes, emotion wise. I would happily choose at times to sit and silently scream and i have been known to wander off alone to a quiet field and actually loudly scream , and sob and think whoever the twat was that decided i needed this type of stress should be shot.

There is always lots of talk on social media these days about autism, but I don’t feel I ever see the true nit grit shit of it from a parents perspective. I have never seen it from a partners perspective who is in my kind of shoes either ( significant other diagnosed at 35 after us being together 15 years)

I am not one to subscribe to the “see it all as an optimist” kind of thing. If its shit, and its going to get shitter, then i will see it, will say it and will shout loudly about just how shit it is right at that moment. I’ve tried being an optimist, it just doesn’t work for me…

I do get the funny times, the literal sense of humour i see within my asd family sometimes has me crying tears of laughter, but the tears i cry of sadness do outweigh those times, most of the time.

I spent alot of my childhood, stoic, holding everything in emotionally (had too, more to come on that front!) so for me this new coming of age crying and letting out the pain of living with autism, has been a tough road so far.

And that is what it is a tough, tough road. That is definitely not all about my kids “special talents” or my partners “amazing lorry knowledge” . This is for all of us who feel like running up that hill and screaming… circa kate bush. running_up_that_hill_video

Today Autism is meh to be frank, tomorrow it may well be awesome………..

 

POSSESSED POTATO!!! — February 19, 2016

POSSESSED POTATO!!!

 

This isnt going to be all spooky shit, i promise but i have to start with the possessed potato….

Two days ago , my cool as shizzle 13 year old daughter asked me if i knew what the funny potato video was, now me, 37, 5 kids, man with autism kids with autism. I am not down with the times right now, but i said “yassss, of course i have seen it, show me again” .

She showed me, funny as fuck . She then proceeded to video herself throwing a potato through our bifolds whilst saying ” a potato flew around the room”. Well, i laughed as only i could, being all down with the teenagers.

I have toyed with having a blog for a while, some say im funny on fb (who fucking isn’t, my fb is full of “funny” people!) toyed about sharing my life, lots of people have told me over the years to write a book, er no, too much hassle, too scary? probably both!

Anyway, back to potatogate. Teenager goes off to bed, i sit down for a glass of wine and catching up with real knobheads of every country, or should that be county… i need a top up, off i head to the fridge.  We have an all singing , all dancing fridge, gives you ice , water everything. It never dances to my tune though, whenever i want ice it goes “fuck you bitch!” and just clogs up.

I return to my seat to find a potato on the settee, exactly where i was sat. Now i know i have a massive floppy arse (thanks child number 2) but i am pretty sure i would have known if i was sat on a potato.